children's inheritanceMost people know estate planning can help you pass along your material wealth, but what about your intangible wealth like your wisdom, values, and life experiences? Studies show that intangible wealth is valued by heirs even more highly than tangible wealth. It is also the wealth that lasts the longest, and the wealth that’s lost forever if care isn’t taken to preserve and pass it along.

Don’t get me wrong. The money’s important. But focusing on the money alone squanders an incredible opportunity during the estate planning process to account for the most important part of your wealth – the human capital you’ve accumulated during your life. With that in mind, here are five things which should be included in every comprehensive estate plan, but often aren’t:

  1. Your rich life story

You may think it’s all been said before, but this is the perfect time to schedule or conduct recording sessions about your own personal life narrative. These recordings will be treasured while you’re still here and long after you’re gone, too. It doesn’t have to be scripted or scary. You can just talk about particularly fond memories, knowing you’re creating a time capsule of sorts that will contain the uniqueness of your personality and the experiences that shaped you into the person you are today. And perhaps most importantly, this gives you the opportunity to share the valuable lessons you’ve learned from those experiences. Your family will be better for it.

  1. How you’d like to be honored

Estate planning involves considering some weighty decisions when it comes to long-term care, powers of attorney, and other situations that may arise should you become mentally incapacitated. Although these are not the sunniest of topics, it’s important to express to your family why you feel most aligned with the choices you’re making. This will ease the processes for your loved ones, should these things ever come to pass. And once you get this part of the conversation out of the way, there are better things to come.

  1. Your family tree

Your family might be curious about more than just your own life story. Take this time to go over your family tree and inform the younger members of your family about the details of your heritage. Getting a who’s who on paper and/or in a digital format is an excellent gift to your heirs, as they’ll be able to reference it and build upon it throughout their own lives.

  1. Significant heirlooms

Every family has heirlooms, and every piece tells a story. It’s common for estate plans to contain physical objects that matter dearly to their owners, such as furniture, garments, jewelry, hobby collections, and memorabilia. Keeping the story of the object alive is more important than transferring its monetary value to the next generation. So rather than just document who gets what, I encourage my clients to take a picture of each heirloom and then write about why that item means so much to them, and why they want to give it to the particular beneficiary they have chosen to receive it.

  1. Your core values

Your estate plan can be customized to include specific language (such as a family mission statement) that carries your values along with it while still leaving room for your beneficiaries to grow and explore on their own terms. Educational, incentive, and charitable trusts are other great tools available to you to express your values through your estate plan.

You know there’s much more to you than the material wealth you’ve accumulated during your life. As such, your estate plan should be about much more than just your financial worth. After all, what’s passed down from generation to generation amounts to something far greater than numbers on paper.

Don’t be afraid to insist that your estate plan includes a balanced representation of who you are and what you believe. And make sure you choose an attorney who isn’t only focused on your financial assets, but who wants to help weave your “whole wealth” into your trust and other critical documents so that the legacy you’ve built will mean something to your family for generations to come.

Dedicated to empowering your family, building your wealth and securing your legacy,

Marc Garlett 91024

 

 

family-valuesBaby boomers know money isn’t the only important aspect of estate planning. For example, a 2012 study released by the Allianz Life Insurance Co. showed baby boomers wanted to leave their family more than just financial assets. Researchers found baby boomers identified family values as some of the most important things to pass down to heirs.

In 2012’s economic climate, it’s no wonder family values were at the top of the list. In economic downturns, financial inheritances are always more tenuous than the consistent worth of family values. Thus, family values (tax-free of course!), made the top of the list in importance.

But what is interesting is a similar study released by Allianz in 2005 which showed family values were also among the most important legacies boomers wanted to leave behind, even though the economy was more robust.

What these studies demonstrate is the enduring importance of family values, morals and meaningful possessions as part of a carefully crafted estate plan, regardless of the economic climate.

Do you have family values you wish to pass on? Of course you do! And yet you likely haven’t acted to ensure the legacy you are creating is the one you really want to leave behind.

Including family values in your estate plan can be easy, when it’s built into the process, though that is not the norm with most estate planning lawyers or with the DIY legal document services. You should consider including written memoirs, video or audio recordings of family stories in your estate plan. Think about it. These are the things most likely to be lost after your death. While your finances will be managed per estate law, intangible values and lessons have no protection and easily fade away soon after you die.

Could you imagine how valuable it would be to hear your family history directly in the words of your grandparents, great-grandparents or even earlier generations right now? What would that be worth? Can you even put a price on it?

I encourage you to think of estate planning not as just a set of documents. If you want to pass down a truly holistic legacy, one that manages and preserves both your finances and your family values, you absolutely can. Work with a lawyer who will guide you in creating a comprehensive estate plan that protects and preserves your whole wealth – not just your financial assets, but your family’s heritage, too. Your heirs will be all the richer for it.

Dedicated to empowering your family, increasing your wealth and building your legacy,
Marc Garlett 91024

Diverse Kids 91024When you picture a “normal” family, what do you see? Is it the traditional notion of one male parent and one female parent, two kids, and a family pet? Or do you see something different? Or perhaps you reject the notion of a “normal” family altogether?

Recent court and legislative activity have opened the institution of marriage to same-gender couples. Regardless of your political position or whether you think this is a wise move, it is happening. Today 1 in 4 children under the age of 18 are being raised by single mothers without a father anywhere in the picture. And nearly 30% of all families today are single parent families. Another 5% of children aren’t living with a “traditional” parent at all, but with grandparents or other family members.

Simply put, mainstream society is changing in our country. It’s important to keep that in mind because sometimes (particularly with affluence) we may not always be aware of changes taking place outside our personal norms. Why not? Well, we often attend institutions – like churches and schools, for example-where most everyone else looks and thinks like we do.

While we may feel more comfortable in these arenas, we need to push the boundaries with our kids for their sake. Regardless of our politics, visible American culture is changing. We cannot expect voluntary segregation of our society-by race, socioeconomic status, or any other factor-to continue.

So how can we help our kids be open to cultural and familial differences and to embrace the complexities therein? Children are best prepared through modeling and practice. This is the true inheritance we leave behind.

Be cognizant of the cultural norms you promote without saying a word, through your choice of neighborhoods, entertainment, institutions, and even the company you keep. It is critical that American children remain open to differences and complexities, to enable them to work and play with those who may be different from them as our society moves forward to keep in step with the ever evolving nature of our world.

Ultimately, estate planning isn’t just about passing on your money. It’s about passing on your whole family wealth, which includes your values, insights, stories and experience, most of which is passed on without awareness. When you can bring awareness to estate planning, however, beyond simply the financial pieces, you are giving your children a true gift that doesn’t last just a lifetime, but for many generations to come.

Dedicated to your family’s health, wealth, and happiness,
Marc Garlett 91024

bigstock-Holding-Hands-564155If you are like most parents, your primary objective is to support your children to be prepared to handle the pressures of adulthood. And if there is a single human trait which helps to navigate all of life’s stages, it is resilience. Resilience is the ability to bounce back, move forward, and learn from the setbacks in life. As a parent, one of the greatest gifts you can give your child is the gift of learning how to make mistakes, learn from them, and grow as a result.

The foundation for developing resilience in your child is threefold: 1) to develop resilience in your own life; 2) to allow your child the freedom to make mistakes, the security to learn from them and the opportunity to move forward with a clean slate; and 3) to let your children see you make mistakes and role model resilience for them with vulnerable power.

Here’s an example: imagine you face a situation at work that creates adversity for you. You could come home and complain about your coworkers, your boss and your team, or you could take full responsibility for your part in creating the stressful situation and share with your child what you are going to do to face the challenge head on and make it better. And, wherever you notice that you made a mistake or could have done something better, tell your child about it and what you learned as a result.

And of course when your child makes a mistake, celebrate the opportunity to learn, rather than reinforcing the negativity of the experience. Remember, some of the most successful people on the planet failed first. What made them an ultimate success? They had the resilience and support to recognize that failure was simply part of the journey and to keep going.

So how does estate planning fit into developing resilience in your children? First and foremost, resilience comes when your children know that no matter what happens, you love and accept them and will always be there for them. It is having that deep knowing that creates the security that allows your children to take the risks that others can’t or won’t. And I believe that’s the ultimate foundation of true success in life.

When you’ve handled your estate planning and talked with your kids about what you’ve set up (if they are old enough), they get the clear message that you’ve done everything possible to be there for them, even if you cannot be there physically.

And by including them in the process when they are old enough, they began to see that you trust them, that you are working with them to design a future that is positive for your whole family and that you value and respect their input.

To your family’s health, wealth, and happiness,
Marc Garlett 91024

bigstock-Group-Of-Diverse-Kids-Or-Child-4652075My guess is that if we did a poll of every parent we know and asked them what they most want for their children, what we would find at the core is that we all want to raise responsible kids.

We may each have a different definition of what responsible means, but after working with many families to plan for the children’s future, I can say with confidence that raising a responsible child is a hallmark of success for most parents.

Once your child becomes seen and known as responsible, your level of freedom and ease increases substantially.

In service to that, I will be sharing with you a series of articles on How to Raise Responsible Kids, starting with this one.

The first step in raising responsible kids, means truly understanding the meaning of the word “responsible”, so we’ll start there.

The classic dictionary definition of responsible is not really what I am speaking of here.

One dictionary definition of responsible is: “having an obligation to do something, or having control over or care for someone, as part of one’s job or role.”

Many parents confuse the kind of responsible that provides real peace and true security, which I’ll speak to in a moment, with the dictionary definition of responsible, which is more of obligation or duty.

Responsibility based in obligation or duty is not nearly as powerful as responsibility based on inspiration and internal motivation.

True responsibility actually means less about your children’s ability to live up to their obligations, hold down a job in the same way you did, or even re-create the lifestyle you’ve been able to provide for them (though all those things would, of course, be great), and more about your children being able “to be trusted to do what is right.”

Over the rest of this series, I’ll look at several different examples of what this means in various contexts, including money, relationship, and work.

I’m looking forward to exploring this with you as we all strive for the true peace of mind and security that comes with raising responsible kids.

If you have any specific questions or thoughts on this, please let me know so I can address them either individually or in an upcoming article.

Dedicated to your family’s wealth, health, and happiness,
Marc Garlett 91024

family estate plan 91024There are many iconic American families that come to mind when we think of vast family wealth. The Vanderbilts, for example, were one of the riches families in America in the 19th century. Cornelius Vanderbilt, the family patriarch, built his railroad and shipping fortune to $100 million before he died in 1877 – which was more than the U.S. Treasury held at the time.

That massive family fortune — which would be more than $200 billion in today’s dollars — has been gone for more than 40 years now. It did not even survive past three generations, primarily due to mismanagement by successive generations of heirs.

A recent Forbes article (it’s a great read, check it out) looked at ways to prepare heirs for an inheritance, with an emphasis on protecting and growing that inheritance. Here are some tips:

Share your vision. Conduct a family roundtable where the heads of the family come together with everyone and share their hopes and dreams for the family, as well as how they plan to reach their goals for the future. The idea is to start an open multi-generational dialogue.

Tell your story. To help younger generations understand the importance of protecting and growing inherited wealth, it helps if they first understand the values and visions of their predecessors. Sharing family memories, experiences and life lessons from older generations is one key component to ensuring the family story continues on well into the future.

Record your story. Your lasting legacy should be much more than just money; it should also be about those valuable intangibles that make your family unique, told through your insights, values and experience. We do this through our legacy planning process, helping you capture and pass on your own story and your aspirations for your loved ones through a special video we produce for each of our clients.

Gather together. Annual family retreats, gatherings, or reunions also help solidify family values and nurture common ground and goals. Consider holding an annual retreat where multiple generations can gather to bond, make plans for the future, and renew family harmony.

Family is one of the great human institutions. Yours can, and should, be the foundation for building real wealth – both financial and personal – for your children and for generations yet to come. With a little foresight and effort it can be done. You can do it. We can help.

As always, I wish all the best to you and your family,
Signature - Marc